1997 at the MOVIES...
TOP 5 RE-RELEASES
1. The Godfather
2. The Empire Strikes Back
3. Contempt
4. Le Samourai
5. Pink Flamingos SEPARATED AT BIRTH: Grosse Point Blank and Good Will Hunting
1. Cutesy titles that play off the character's name
2. Young stars who also co-wrote the script
3. Minnie Driver as the quirky girlfriend
4. Characters who are way too smart for their dead-end jobs
5. Great mood/plot accentuating soundtracks
6. Pivotal moments in school hallways
7. Stars/co-writers get their real-life siblings work as bit-players
8. Comedic psychiatrist/paternal figures
9. Initially cold protagonists transformed by love
10. They're both in color STAR FETISHES
*Jennifer Lopez's butt in U-Turn
*Joey Lauren Adams' voice in Chasing Amy
*Rosanna Arquette's body-brace in Crash
*Parker Posey's psychotic personality in House of Yes
*Minnie Driver's jawbones in Grosse Point Blank and Good Will Hunting
*Kim Basinger's Veronica Lake peek-a-boo in L.A. Confidential
*Milla Jovovich's Band-Aid outfit in The Fifth Element SCARED STRAIGHT
In and Out SEX IN '97
*A transsexual beds his boyhood chum in Different for Girls.
*Parker Posey goes down on her brother while they re-create JFK's assassination in House of Yes.
*Judy Davis fucks Stalin to death in Children of the Revolution.
*A man bumps uglies with his television in Conspirators of Pleasure.
*Molly Parker as an embalmer has a passion for cadavers in Kissed.
*Steven Soderbergh in a dual role plays a husband and the lover with whom his wife is secretly having an affair in Schizopolis.
*Christina Ricci dons a Nixon mask for a sex scene in The Ice Storm. BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Mark Wahlberg's prosthetic penis in Boogie Nights BEST COMEBACKS
*Peter Fonda in Ulee's Gold,
*Burt Reynolds in Boogie Nights and Citizen Ruth
New Year's FREEBIES
The best way to get free stuff for your newborn (well, second best, after having seven of them at once) is to arrange for your baby to be the first one born in the new year (a tradition invented to console new-year parents about missing the tax deduction by a matter of seconds). Some people will do anything to get something for free, but a baby (or seven) on cue can be an impossible challenge. Luckily, there are a couple of free New Year's benefits this year, even for the childless. In one of the more amazing comeback stories of the year, Odwalla rebounded from a rash of negative press over E. coli poisonings by going on a public-relations rampage--and, of course, making damn fine juice. On New Year's Eve, the company is offering free Odwalla juice and spring water to designated drivers at LaLuna or the Crystal Ballroom. If you're the stumbling one, and your sober driver makes friends with a member of the Zen Tricksters or Calobo and ditches you, grab one of the Odwalla-sponsored taxi vouchers for a free ride home. For post-New Year's hangovers, nothing beats a good old greasy batch of french fries. See for yourself on "Free Fryday" (Jan. 2), when every Burger King across the nation will hand out free small orders of its new-and-improved fries--no purchase necessary. Weirdly enough, our own survey showed that the new fries are better. The secret recipe, which has been in the works for more than two years, keeps them hotter longer. Sounds scary, but--chemically enhanced or not--these fries actually taste more like potatoes. What a concept. --Christina Melander
Trends that WILL CONTINUE in 1998
1. THE CRUSADE TO OUTLAW LAND MINES
2. PORK
3. SWING MUSIC AND THE CLASSY ACCOMPANYING DRESS
4. STATION WAGONS
5. PERSONAL FLASKS
6. FEMALE ROCKERS
7. OLD-STYLE HOLLYWOOD GLAMOUR
8. MIDWIVES
9. STRAPLESS SHIRTS
10. '70S CHIC Trends we hope WON'T CONTINUE in 1998
1. THE CRUSADE TO HONOR PRINCESS DIANA WITH SCHLOCKY TRIBUTES
2. CHICKEN
3. DISCO MUSIC AND THE TRAMPY ACCOMPANYING LOOK
4. SPORT UTILITY VEHICLES
5. PERSONAL WEB SITES
6. MALE ROCKERS WHO QUALIFY FOR AARP MEMBERSHIP
7. THE PHRASE "OLD SCHOOL"
8. MULTIPLE BIRTHS
9. SLIPS WORN AS DRESSES
10. THE PAT BENATAR '80S LOOK --Christina Melander |
